115.01 BECOMING HIS TOTAL SERVICE.

Week 115.01 DAY 1: Ok so the introduction here got me into the Dream state again and to have the encounter with the City Leadership allowed an even greater realization and experience. So yes, this is about my deepest desires, again. 

Which evidently are all about GOD!

I mean to see the dream scape come through again so clearly and even being able to explain specifics to a City Leader! Wow, I mean someone who understood. And this week starts with these Dreams, both in my life experience and the SEEL Lessons, and then continues with letting God Work on Us! 

Yes, to become more ready to DO the Will and . . . Achieve eagerly the works of Christ. . . To bring Forth the Kingdom of God . . .

And you have just had a direct experience of this. . . Describe what you felt and what you know about this.

Uhg, you got me again. So I get this Spike on my Back, which I’ve come to recognize as the wings extending from my back . . . Yes, it’s the very distinct feeling of muscles flexing. . . And it normally comes from the center of my spin or like two extra shoulder-blades coming a bit lower than my own, to be the wings in the center of my back. It’s really some supernatural mystical experience, which I would say shows up randomly. Lol, just like the bone in the center of my chest that springs out in extreme joy and bliss. . . Not really random at all but very defined in time and space. 

So this week one in seel is about some earth leader! To place some civic leader, or earthly king before me, just seems so preposterous, and useless! I guess this whole passage began with revealing the Garden of Eden Dreams to a City Leader, so it really only makes sense to consider a worldly leader as we begin this next week, since apparently that was my actual experience.

But, in Fact DAY 2: stepping into the Kingdom of Christ is the whole point of everything. Returning to the Garden of Eden is always about making the space for God to return to partnership to Walk and Share the Love, Joy, and Beauty of Creation with his Children. And to finally return to Eden after the Fall, seems like such an awesome Dream, that no other could approach.

We know you have been laboring for these works. You negotiated and accepted the terms for your return and readily stepped into every opportunity you perceived that could open these goals up for you. This of course, became a distraction until you learned a bit more about discernment. And this continues to be a challenge for you as you continue to learn more. You have been diligent in your studies. And you have accepted that these studies will continue to expand as you move forward.

Yes, and I have accepted this GRACE to get closer and more unified with you to step into more growth, understanding and ACTION implementing the WILL OF GOD, as you, your Angels and Saints continue to lead me . . . . As the grace to open eager action for Jesus continues to flow!

We are making this work more and more each day. It’s opening you more and more each day. It’s not something new for you, and will only grow and expand as you step-out more.

I realize that i need to get more specific and focus in my works and my daily prayers.  Yes, the regular exercises, the bike, swim, and sunshine . . . And the tasks that appear before me regularly. It’s not a surprise, but it’s becoming more present. I’m listening to the Nine Grades of Prayer again and Grade Eight is about Ecstatic Prayer of Conforming Union where I actually loose touch with all my senses for you to engage and direct me as your life. I guess this last week has certainly revealed to me how much I have done this all my life. 

And it’s repeated here in the SEEL exercise where JESUS always seeks to change the whole world away from the sins of selfishness to the Glory of sharing WHOLEHEARTEDLY in the Divine Tasks and Mission of Jesus . . . Especially to be and act as the Christ by BECOMING HIS TOTAL SERVICE.

. . .

I Love You Dear Lord Jesus Christ, Thank You Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I Love You Dear Lord Jesus Christ,

115.00 Wow dreams again.. it will never flood again

Ok we started week #15 and it’s clearly aligned with my life and direct experience now.  I literally found phrases in this next section that identified the high points of my week. I am recognizing more and more of God’s walk and experience with me directly . . . . 

This is really getting more powerful all the time. I’m getting closer to my purpose and mission every day. Like to be and express the full Dream and Vision God has for this World. I just wrote in my blog how I had come home, after the motorcycle death because God wanted me to stay and finish some task on earth. 

It was almost like a conversation, joking about the possibilities as if it were something new to us. . . “Dang eric you promised you could do this . . . “And I literally sent an email yesterday to leadership about stepping into the real glory we are here for . . . So here again everything has come full-circle and I don’t have to do anything. . . Literally single letter typed out the entire paragraph here now with another ai app, that Steve Jobs:  
added to my iPad last week. As crazy as I get’s I can record how I do this and how it took forever to do it, but it’s still fun to do and watch before my eyes . . . . . . How much do I really need to do here for the computer to write all my words without my efforts at all. And again I FLASH into another place, knowing how deep my explorations are with Jesus. And knowing that I can share these things !, , 

We told you it would all come in time . . . And you trusted enough to step into things and talk with people. . . You step more into this truth every day. And achieve wonders by accident, hurting your hand, cutting your figures. But still step in and achieve.. . . That three hour movie was no easy understanding. And then to find the Gospel to

Wow? Video too, but you can’t hear my voice, but only see the words at the bottom of the screen flash with a black box as I pick them with the invisible mouth, flying all over the screen moving things. . . . !, , 

We could have Made it easier for you . . . But you seem to have so much fine. Like you found this clip below when YOU ASKED, but then never included the link or address, leaving those who can read lost for weeks. And again there are so many deeper experiences flowing as each red letter appears. ESPECIALLY for those who see the “READ” word actually change to be a “RED” word. . . . Such crazy stories and parables here in this moment that are so far beyond.

I love when you do these stories . . . I know I’ve been hiding too long, and I know I need to just trust, and accept that I’ve got nothing to do, but move through this world, exactly loved and experienced as YOU R! 

I had to go back and search through my blogs as I could feel what we spoke about. And again I awoke before my prayerline times, and heard alarm to get started. I prayed with a dozen this week, and the last this morning wanted to sign-up to volunteer for our prayerline. I’m so happy to speak about TheJoyFM.com and told Susan from Australia to write Linda@TheJoyFM.com She asked me to do another prayer to guide her to helping the people in her nation. She said nine committed suicide last year, and she wanted guidance to help and love those in torment. Yes, we have prayer ministers from all over the world as I’ve spoken to people from Australia, New Zealand, Canada, and Europe before. So again I said to write Linda and offer to do two hours a week . . . 

I then asked if she had seen The Chosen, and she admitted she had heard that before. But wouldn’t because the Mormons were involved. I told her how the video crew had gotten lots of supporters including the Salvation Army and the Mormons who had built Jewish temples and replicas that were used to make The Chosen as real and authentic as possible. They even had filmed the next Season Six about the crucifixion in Italy where they found a small town that looked similar to Jerusalem when Jesus carried the cross.

She told me she saw a movie The Gospel of John, with Henry Ian Cusick… wow I found it and am watching it now, where the story line is actually reading through this book in the Bible. I’m actually impressed with it and very grateful to Susan for this now. I told her The Chosen was really wonderful. It had been announced on the same radio station with Linda’s Prayerline, so I watched it from Covid. And the first time I saw it, I bought the first season DVD’s to send my children and father! 

Of course, then I told her that The Chosen actually uses the exact bible phrases for all the miracles of Jesus. And each one that I see puts me in tears. I’ve even seen clips on Facebook and other places of just the miracles and went into tears. They have done a remarkable work. The Chosen Season Five that just came out is Holy Week and Six will be the Crucifixion then Seven will be Pentecost. They are translating it all into 600 languages so all the world could know the true gospel and story of Jesus Christ. Yes Mormons, Salvation Army, Utah, Texas, Italy creating the real history and authenticity we all need to see in the life of Jesus. They even have Critical Round Tables in The Chosen App where a Jewish Rabbi, Catholic Father, and Protestant Scholar discuss and debate the scripture and how the movies are exploring it. These scholars also reviewed and edited the script before the movies were produced. So in fact, missing this Gift From God, is listening to satan and hiding from the Love shared there, as Saint John did for this movie 2:18:38 in the gospel of John.

Oh yes SEEL Readings now, so I went back and read the Highlights in the book SEEL Week #15 above and felt tears coming up again. And I read and feel the Blessings I have been Given! Knowing again the Full-Circle I’ve experienced this week. Wow, returning to USF sharing Dreams with a CITY leader. Yes we can live without cars and greed. Let me show you, we could build a system around Snell Island and it will never flood again. !, , 

What was most significant this time was that you got very specific on how it works and that it was really nothing new at all, but simply taking the technology and ability of the society to a higher level. You made this into a real experience she could understand, gave her immediate images online with her and then also gave her the specific links where she could read, understand, and move forward. 

I’ve read through to this Line a dozen times now and have gotten up, gotten coffee, or gotten distracted before saving it and I am here again starting over. I know Jesus does this sometimes too, where I wrote something I shouldn’t or forgot some critical element. Like when I can just punch the words at the bottom of the screen . . . !, , 

Yes, We wanted you to include these pictures . . .and now you recounted the key phrases from the first page of this weeks SEEL Lessons, so you can get busy and pick-up from where you left off. . . YES BIKE to sunrise, exercise, swim, do it all. If you are serious about stepping into the greatest life other. . . Good is not enough. God has the most trouble to get the last pieces together. 

I get it. I know I was made FOR YOU CHRIST JESUS, and I know how you easily take my mind, body and soul as your expression of your Glory. I am so grateful to be your “lump of clay” to create something totally new. And I see how we are stepping into the greatest moment for everyone. And I can do it all, as the sunrise is 7:34am. I started my TheJOYfm.com to hear Charles Stanley, I love this guy. He is really brilliant, talking about the “independent streak” that no man wants to surrender. Mistakes where people hold onto something that keeps them away from God.

I know it’s all temporary and passing and really insignificant for us to hold something separately from God . . . . ! Sometimes we need to lose something to come to God instead of something of earth. Resisting God’s directions and holding something will be trouble. Real success is all the FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT.

WOW, YOU GOT IT SON. . . . . ! 

114.02 I see and realize how wonderful and awesome my experience is

Yes the next piece… Day 5 Psalm 42

I Could sense my struggles today, finding my class grades are due in a few days. Then the models are not going yet, nor do I know if I can get it done. I know there is a lot more there than I know. There is always so much more for me to do. And that’s my place and challenge as usual. . . . 

I decided to go back and reread this Psalm since I only had part of it listed here and I know there is always so much more.  And it was important for me to see and share where I’m feeling now. I was sorta blind-sided, where I was hit with something that I didn’t expect or didn’t know. 

I’m always ready for anything, and rarely concern myself about unexpected details. I mean there always seems to be a work around, or something specific that makes everything work out. It’s all good. . . 

I highlighted what jumped out at me again . . . . And once again I see and realize how wonderful and awesome my experience has always been. And of course I really never have a reason to question or wonder about anything before me as I am always guided so well.

For example, this morning I woke up and saw my new homeless tenant had cleared out an area by my house. He really did a good job but I had no idea what was next or how to move forward. I heard from Jesus or likely Saint Joseph, to grab my drill gun and go out back to take out the broken section of fence.

What??.

Yes, that seemed odd, but I did it anyway. And as soon as it was opened, the whole space was clear to me, and suddenly I saw exactly what was next for me, and how to proceed on the next phase of cleaning out my property. 

More remarkable than anything was how I suddenly looked at the time and it was exactly time for me to stop outside and get ready to run to class and do the next task on my list.  Of course, I was really grateful and I thanked Jesus for the guidance and direction. And of course, then I started to pick up more tools and do work again anyway. But then I stopped to go get in the shower and get ready to go accepting the guidance immediately!

It's interesting how I hear the guidance and step to take action in that direction, but then almost immediately I get distracted again to do my own tasks instead of as I get directed. Yea satan, is desperate to interfere and mess me up anyway possible. I guess it's really funny as I know his game and I also know how Jesus is so very clear and strong all the time too . . . 

Day 6: Matthew 3:13 came through to me really strong now too. As I highlighted key words and phrases I wasn't clear how they were related or what the focus was. Then going back and rereading l felt the love of God leading and guiding again. How it was really all about Jesus loving God and listening to God's will. Jesus came to John to allow this ritual to continue, clearly honoring the Will of GOD.

This of course, comes through to me so strongly, as each day I struggle to better follow all the tasks before me, accepting the works and challenges openly. Of course, listing to Charles Stanley this morning, he said how important it was to Ask Jesus about your major choices, not necessarily “ALL” the choices, even joking about what to wear or what to eat. And I was laughing, as Jesus has told me both dozens of times, even like ”breaktime, have a beer!” Like yesterday, was another full and complete day where my morning prayerline, had a caller who called back in moments, as he had forgotten to ask for all he really needed. Of course, I had already complimented him on being so clear and focused before doing his first prayer. So with the Second call and prayers, I told him to volunteer for the Prayerline and gave him Linda's email.

Ask and keep on asking, seek and keep on seeking, knock and keep on knocking to get wherever you are going. . . It Figures as SEEL Day 7 is to SAVOR the GRACES from God. So I’m in tears again remembering Betsy and Biking in the blessed Place of Jesus. . . Toasting our earnestness in this spirit and goals before me. I recognized how strong it was to get myself set in my new schedule. And really stepping into it and knowing it’s part of my place. Then the brothers showing up to support me after I sat through a new class I need to do.

Then the next morning we did the Rosary, and telling the Fraternity brothers how wonderful it was to come full-circle. Back teaching what I know best. Back in Church at regular times. And making time for the events and details we need to address each day. I mean, I even brought in my tithing which turned into an excuse to visit the church office with the hymnal that has my mom’s name upside down. . . . Weird as it was they offered to fix the book, and gave me a brick with her name, to go in the new Mother Mary Gardens they are rebuilding.

Wow, all things are exactly where they need to be. . .  And I’m savoring every moment of it.

114.01 SEEL again in God’s Favor, seeking to share

114: Jesus youth…

Imagination Prayer focus here is kind of interesting, as it places me back in my experience at this same age. 

It’s not so much a challenge, as it really feels so familiar somehow? I mean, not that I could have had similar experiences, but the sense of being alone and doing what comes to me. . . I guess, I still do that now? I’m not ever 100% sure of anything. And to trust and step into things that seem sorta ambiguous is very common for me.



This sounds like what I felt reading Luke today. Yes Jesus stepped into exactly where he belonged and did exactly what was needed. No one else will ever do that, but to experience the feeling, and understand more, and learn more is the goal here.

Evidently, this age and time period is really important. I had the odd experience of biking off somewhere again and suddenly Jesus said how I was on My bike Betsy, from High School again in NJ. Yes, I looked down at my bike and felt that same love and joy I got on my bike lost in the hills and trees of NJ. Yes, that same wonderful experience of twelve, not yet a teenager, but ready and excited to do anything as I biked everywhere. Yes, I could always do anything fearless and confident.

Yes, I was totally floored… I mean to be filled with the love and joy of sharing the beauty and experience of my bike ride with Jesus and Betsy again. And again I had the feeling and realization about how I could be doing this for the next fifty years. Or in the peace of Jesus for all eternity.

I know there is something here about carrying this forward and creating the space and atmosphere for experiencing more of his love and joy each moment. As I started this next chapter, Dick reminded me to do the Lectio Divina, where I read the Bible very slowly and carefully to pull out the words that were really strong for me. . . .




And it was really so strong with my Bike Ride and Betsy reminding me how to live According the God’s Laws for increasing my Wisdom through God’s Favor. And these words are so strong here in this passage reflecting the learning and experiences that I stumble on again now.



Day 1 Luke 2:39-40 Again feels like coming home again. Being twelve, where I can know and recognize that love and Spirit of God’s Favor, seeking to share the deeper Wisdom and Understanding of His Laws. Like in this very moment with Betsy, my bike, guiding me to safety and easily avoiding the street potholes, and staying in the open clear paths ahead of me. Yes, this immediate experience of knowing I’m safe and guided. Knowing God’s Favor and accepting my place and responsibility to BE Twelve again, filled with God’s Joy and Wisdom following the Laws and Guidance I receive in His Grace. How wonderful to have this experience now.


Sunday now! My Prayerline calls were sparse. But I still had really strong experiences, where each caller was very focused and clear about their needs. I even told one to join the Prayerline, since they were so focused and clear. I also had one who needed to Renounce and Command in the name of Jesus to remove some fear and anxiety.. And then another who needed to get outside and love the grace and Beauty that God is all around us, in the beauty of nature.



Of course, as I am writing now in my extra room, with the fan running after my morning outside in the yard gardening. Yes cleaned and showered now to write as I fast another holy day. Yes, I decided to fast every other day. Yesterday I had my morning fruit and then a steak and veggies later on. Friday I had coffee and my fruit drink, as again today I will as well. Yes, yesterday I had some peanuts and read more about sprouting them first. Then also had some of my favorite EatingEvolved Chocolate bars. . . But I think Nabisco bought them out, so no more fresh organics from there I’m sure!

The Day 2 Lectio with Luke 2:41-50 was more intimate for me as I could sense how little concern Jesus Had about His Parents. . . . Of course, He was in his Fathers house, busy with whatever tasks God had placed before him. They already knew who he was and what he had before him, so "why were you looking" . . . Where they recognized he was only twelve, and were unaware of how soon he might begin his work, so they were searching and looking for him.

It is odd again as I read and feel this experience of the unaware searching parent. And again I feel myself at twelve and my mother being completely aware and knowing I was always off getting into something. She really struggled to Keep me out of Trouble, and taught me all sorts to stay safe. So I was the one who was really unaware. But My mom really sensed, understood, and accepted what was before me. I mean hindsight is 20/20, so now as I wonder and consider all she did for me. . . She really knew a lot more than I could ever imagine. And still today I’m learning from her, and recognizing her beauty and grace watching out for me, and hiding me, and protecting me as she knew something about where I was heading and what was before me…. That I still cannot understand…. -
.Day 3:Luke 51-52 What I found fascinating this time was how they still didn't understand, but his mother treasured these things in her heart.



Again I think of my mom and how she always understood so much and might have treasured, or might not have. I guess she did, as she would always go out of her way for me. Always trying to do more, guide more, lead more, protect more. . . Whether it was a treasure I surely doubt. But there is really so much more she has left here for me to learn and explore. Now Day 4 is repeating and re-evaluating these Graces and Experiences shared with Jesus and his Family. I’ve seen many wonderful families and how they are all together and supporting each other. I’ve really only had glimpses. I’ve seen how this brotherhood of the Men’s Fraternity has been more “family” and supportive than anything I’ve ever witnessed. I mean, I’ve been married twice and seen other families, but never had any reason or need to get any love or support. Of course, Joyce in High School was much like my mom, supporting, listening and caring for me unconditionally as almost Magic.




Hallow app: in order to learn how to pray, we need to first learn how to listen. We walked through the Our Father prayer line by line and opened ourselves up to hearing God’s voice. Today we’re going to continue listening for God as we look at a way of praying with the Bible called Lectio Divina. Now, those two words may either be very familiar to you or you might think I’m speaking a different language. Either way, you’re right! Lectio Divina is a Latin phrase that means “divine reading.” It’s a powerful process of praying with Scripture that was developed in the earliest monastic communities. And it’s a spiritual discipline that has changed not only my life but the lives of countless Christians all around the world. So, let me ask you a question: Wherever you are in your life - married, single, young, old, student, or retiree - if you could sit with Jesus for 10, 15, 20 minutes a day and hear Him speaking to you, would you do it? I think the answer is a big “YES”! We could all use a word from the Lord right now - about our marriages, our work, our parenting, our friendships, our finances, about anything that we are carrying. That’s what Lectio Divina can do for us. God gave us the ability to hear His voice. It may not always be in ways that are spectacular, miraculous, or otherworldly. Oftentimes, God speaks to us in a very gentle, quiet voice that can get drowned out by all the other noises in our lives. In my experience, one of the best ways that we can hear the “still, small voice of God” is in his sacred Word: the Bible. The Bible is much more than a collection of stories or an historical account of what happened to the Jewish people. It is a love letter from our Heavenly Father to us, for our encouragement and enlightenment. In the Gospel of John, Jesus says: “I am the good shepherd… My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me” (Jn. 10:27). Prayerfully reading Scripture through the practice of Lectio Divina helps us grow in relationship with Jesus, our Good Shepherd, so that we can know his voice more clearly and follow him with our whole hearts. So, how do you get started? Many people who pray with Scripture using lectio divina follow the four simple steps laid out centuries ago by a monk named Guigo the Carthusian. He described them as a four-rung ladder that lifts us up from earth to heaven. We’ll put them all into practice together in just a minute, but I’ll explain them briefly now. The first thing we do when praying with Lectio Divina - and really the first thing we should do anytime we approach the Lord in prayer - is ask for God’s help. St. John Paul II said that one condition for Lectio Divina is that the mind and heart be illumined by the Holy Spirit, that is, by the same Spirit who inspired the Scriptures, and that Scripture be approached with an attitude of “reverential hearing.” So we begin Lectio Divina by asking for the Holy Spirit to help us read - or listen to - His divine word. We recall the words of St. Paul in his letter to the Romans, who said, “the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words.” Let that be our first prayer: Holy Spirit, teach us to pray. Now once we have called on God for his help, the next step is to read, or “Lectio.” Choose a small passage of Scripture - usually no more than say three to five verses - and simply read it slowly, carefully. I often recommend praying with the Gospel from the Daily Mass readings. Another option could be to choose a short passage from the Book of Psalms or Proverbs - anything that speaks to you and opens you up to hear God’s voice. The key with this first step of Lectio Divina is to figure out: What does this passage say - what are the facts? Notice keywords, nouns and verbs: people, things and actions. Anything that’s repeated. Things compared or contrasted. Pay attention to any words or phrases that stand out to you. About the point when you start moving from gathering facts to wondering about them, it’s time for the next step. “Meditatio,” or Meditate, is when we begin to get into the Word so deeply that we begin discovering not just what it says, but what it means. The word for “meditate” in Hebrew is ‘hagah’. To hagah is to vocalize; it is to meditate on something so strongly that you respond audibly from the depths of your soul. In Isaiah 31:4, a lion “hagahs” over its prey. Hagah is an active chewing on the word of God, a savoring its flavor. It’s like “chewing the cud,” getting out every last drop. So how do you do it? You can ask questions about the details you noted in the last step. You’ve been asking who, what, when, where. Now ask, Why? or What does it mean? What might God be saying to me through this passage? As you meditate on what Scripture means, the next natural step is to begin thinking of how it applies to you. At this point, you turn to God and respond to Him. Now, the third step of Lectio Divina is called “Oratio,” or prayer. This is the place we’ve been looking for from the start: prayerful reading that brings about an intimate dialogue: we hear God speaking to us, and we respond with an open heart. There are many ways you can respond, and they’re all right. The Bible gives us a number of different examples: Mary pondering things in her heart; Abraham arguing with God; Jacob wrestling with Him. From the Gospels, the father of the son possessed by a demon, who says: “Lord I believe; help my unbelief!" What is in your heart? Talk to God. Stay with Him and expect an answer. As you pray, listen. The point of this step is simply to respond. If you have trouble, ask yourself: What is God saying to me, and what do I want to say back? When we pray, we gradually are lifted into God’s presence and filled with His peace – which brings us to the next step: “Contemplatio,” or Contemplate. Now, this is less something you do than it is the result of what you have been doing. It is the fruit of your labors, like enjoying the flowers that come up in the garden you have planted and watered and tilled. Your mind is lifted to God, and you experience His presence with joy and peace. Imagine sitting with someone you love on the beach, watching the sunset. Just being with them, communicating without words. Or staring at your child as she sleeps and feeling that love. This intense satisfaction is what you will feel as your mind is lifted up to God and held there in quiet joy. The point of this step is to spend time in God’s presence. I invite you to notice that “prayer” as we often think of it—us talking to God—is only one of the steps! And it’s the third step, at that. It’s not the starting place, it comes after we call out to God and listen to His word. It may be tempting to speed up and skip steps BUT: become like a child, take one step at a time. Be willing to work at it – like cultivating a vine. It will pay off in the end, like the labor of tending grapes pays off in good wine.

113.0 SEEL WEEK 13 question about the glory of God

This piece has been really quick and easy as it built on the imagination we did the week before. It's even asking for things that I just did. Like “becoming part of the scene” sounds like my earlier experience of being an ant on the scene watching what was happening. It's neat too, when I consider the colloquy conversation, which always feels like a bunch of old friends talking together. And then my mom or Saint Michael comes in too. No big deal! It's like just part of the crew, who are there checking on me all the time anyway. 

This reminds me of when I first did the Consecration to Mary. And it was like I was talking to an old friend that I’ve known all along. Of course, I always thought she was Mother Nature instead, but evidently that’s no surprise for her either . . . . 

Then, as I read the other passages in the Bible, the only pieces that jump out at me, are the parts about God, sending an angel to come to Joseph’s dreams.

I guess most everyone wants to have angels visit. But I know that was something I requested with my accident deal/negotiation to go to Tampa. Saying no airy fairy stuff, if you wanted me here on Earth, save the angels for Joseph’s dreams. . . . 

I’ve since realized that was a BIG mistake. And sorta asked for it to be reversed allowing Angels to visit me more often…Yes, I have learned how nice it is to have real experiences more and more. And I've been leaning to trust my spontaneous insights more and to step into more as well. As I've experienced before how random people recognize something deep in spirit about me, and I just need to KNOW this and LOVE all those neighbors.

That has really been my love and experience with young children, where they could always see and know the spirit inside of me and respond to me in their OWN Divinity. It's really like the Younger the better even. And I've really always loved that experience and worked really hard to honor and respect whatever experience has come to me.

Now Day 3 with Isaiah 9 speaking again of the Christ baby, where I just wrote of the joy I feel seeing Christ in every baby. Silly as it is, Cristopher asked about history and I went back looking through my archives and found a video of my first meeting Madison. Wow, what a great thing to see now again!

Reading Day 4 with Matthew 2 scripture I flashed back to the experience I had watching Mary and Joseph walking to Bethlehem. I remember they suddenly stepped on a cloud and floated off over the mountains. Again my imagination always gets the best of me. So when I stop to reconsider a flash I experienced already. It is always revisiting a place I have been, and now it expands into more details and the images grow more and more complicated. Like it’s some cloudy musty day, where they are walking along, and they don’t even notice how they step into a low spot on the trail, where the clouds are all around, covering their feet, and they’re all suddenly floating, and their movement brings them higher and higher up, out of the trail, out over the land in front of them. 

There is so much more details now, and I remember the images I first saw, wondering how it would feel and work. But just knowing this is about the Mystery again. Knowing how GOD loves the surprise and the wonder of the moment, where no one knows or understands, but something miraculous and supernatural happens, just as a matter of fact. Like of course, they are protected and cared for beyond all recognition!

Now the last two days to savor this Joy and bliss we find in the grace of God and all he provides. How can I ever question or wonder about the glory of God. . . . 

112.2 SEEL imagination to see my place with Spirit Better

 I am starting again with the last days of SEEL with Imaginative Prayers, I need to get deeper into this Image I’ve been exploring . . . Learning more and stepping into know God Better. It’s important to step into this more clearly. As the idea of imagining the direct personal time with Jesus with His birth, and now stepping beyond this to Stand in the presence of the Glory of God. Knowing that His Love and Spirit seeks to live and express through my life. . . My experience, my now, here as we can see and visualize these deeper experiences and imagine a deeper stronger expression of Jesus living through me this very moment before you. . . . Wow!

Feeling deeper into my understanding and experience is really the whole point of this lesson. I've always had a very powerful imagination, where I can step into another time and space really easily and I can really be there in some sense. I've noticed my ability to empathize with other people is really strong too.  And now I realize I’ve really never read much, and avoided books because I put myself into these places and am always feeling deeply into people too much, especially when the books are creating sin and deceptions. I’ve felt guilty for never reading anything, but suddenly I now understand why. It’s a good thing I’ve avoid this culture of greed and deception. I mean, I can feel something from a car driving by, “oh that lady is feeling this”. . . . so to put this all into a book might have really been too much for me . . . Uhg, maybe it’s time to read the Bible!

I have always been able to easily feel the pain and struggle of people around me. This is interesting to get the idea in Day 6 of letting go of a place or a scene of being there with Jesus during HIS Birth, to simply be in the presence of God, to fully sense and experience this moment Of HIM.  Holding onto this simple divine moment I am writing about, just to “BE” and fully engage in this silent Peace and Joy of God.

This seems very familiar to me now as in the last week or so, I recognized the feeling and experienced how God shares in the warmth of my heart whenever I Pray with others. I’ve noticed this at church too. Where I get the very powerful warmth in my heart. I notice this at events during the day too, especially with the Prayerline calls I do Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays.

Recognizing more of this singular experience, is knowing that my solitude and peace its about accepting that I have more time to Honor God. Jesus here with Mary and Joseph, help me to align my will with Yours for the glory of God in the name of Jesus, Amen.

This brings me back to day one:  

But again stepping into God’s Wisdom and Glory to recognize that there is something about my past that I buried. And instead of finding and forgiving some karma, I’ve been caught into these obstacles of Doubt and Fear.

This is really so powerful for me, as I realize now how my dad will be here .. tomorrow and my son has lost it yesterday. And now again in my space and time the random experience of sharing God’s Beauty and Love, in His Son dying to share and teach whatever could be next for me. And suddenly, I have this typo “Ely,” and see my mother name? Of course, I couldn’t erase or correct this. . .

Why is my mom showing up for me now? Could it be to understand  more about why I feel lost in doubt and fear about some karma I have hidden deep down inside . . . about my mom. Yes, “About my Mom?”

Yes, so my mom, showed up again this morning  (June 6, 2025 8am Mass). When I first joined the church, I was working again for a time, and they said they needed to buy new hymnals. Wow, so I gave them $444.44 for new hymnals… yes like I always give to the JoyFm, since Madison was born 4/4. . . So this morning was the first time I saw any hymnals with my mom’s name on it. I mean, even a thousand hymnals, I figured 5 or 10 might have my mom’s name, and I would see it sooner or later.

but to see it today! This morning? What? What did I miss now?  What is she teaching me now?

Roy was sitting in front of me. So I had to show it to him. I mean, I just couldn’t believe it. Taking pictures or writing about it is one thing. But no one believes anything anymore, with the AI-bots making videos of people talking and all sorts of made-up crap everywhere. So I wanted him to see it, just so he could confirm to me that I wasn’t seeing things . . . 

Yes, he read it and recognized what it was, commenting about it later at our men’s prayer meeting.  When Scott heard about it, he commented about seeing my Exodus Fraternity Group post asking for the brothers to help me find one of the hymnals with her name on it.

Of course, I just started to cry there in church. Yes,  tears rolling down my face during Mass. And I had to snap pictures and send things out. Like I realized I had tried to talk to Sharon about this trauma I’ve found hidden in me. I knew I needed it pursue this initial instinct speaking with Sharon. I'm really not sure what she can share and explain to me, but I recognize that if this is my instinct, then there is something real here for me to pursue. 

I guess it might be something with Chris too. So now I guess it's all about getting real about my own imagination and visions of Christ Jesus, and my own son.  I wonder when I first considered having a child?

Repeated from Mass this morning... Of course now I know I need to step into something for my mom.  And now I remember sending all her grandkids the Rosary for Christmas one year, and now I wonder if it was about these Holy Women trying to reach my son who was spinning out of control…

I found this picture that my dad wrote on. Yes, that's my dad's handwriting on the top. This is the back of one of the many pictures I made for my mom that was returned to me when she passes or when they left Florida. I added all the other dates so I could keep track of everyone in the family. I’ve not had any real relationship with any of them.

Well of course not, since my dad always had contempt for me, why would any of my siblings have anything other than contempt. Of course, they all had some excuse about me being a blacksheep or a trouble maker.

Of Course, the reality is something that I only learned about years later. I realized how the Waldwick Police always ignored me, or simply refused to arrest me, because they saw My dad's belt swinging at me in the parking lot before we even left the police staton. Of course. I was trapped in the front seat of the moving car next to him, and I really couldn't hide, run, escape or even protect myself. So I'm sure this was one of the many times that I had belt marks across my face . . . I never considered what a policeman would think seeing that . . . Which became obvious years later!

What was more bizarre than anything, was that my dad picked me up at the police station while I was still in middle school. Like not even a teenager yet. Then after that the police avoided me. I could see them watching me, almost like they were spying on me, just to see what they would let me get away with next. At least until I was 19 or 20 diving my rabbit through town  . . .  lol , drunk . . . .

Yes, that was when I learned about it. The cop pulled me over. Drunk, speeding, avoiding arrest . . . Wow, he could have locked me up. But no!  “Eric is that you, do you know what your Father will do to you if I arrest you again?” And then he asked if any one else in the car could drive. And the other kid in the backseat drove us home . . . One of my friends who did not even have a drivers license . . . Of Course, it was years later before I realized what had actually happened.  I mean my friends were perplexed that any cop would let a drunk go, especially when I turned off my headlights and sped-up when I saw his flashing lights behind me. But then no tickets, no arrest, and all but an escort home . . He was terrified of what would happen to me. The police would have nothing to do with my father’s insane violence and abuse that would bring jail time if witnessed today.

Course I wonder now, if my experiences here had something to do with the laws changing. . . 

Oh yes, bible lessons, six clear steps for unlocking the door of forgiveness. 

1. Find someone you trust to pray with you. It helps if this person is spiritually mature. Look for someone who has suffered as a Christian and been made stronger for it; someone you know has had to forgive; someone with whom you feel safe. This same person may assist you in responding to the message of the next three chapters. 

2. Begin to praise God and thank Him. “Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise” (Psalm 100:4). Ask the Holy Spirit to lead you. 

3. When you sense His presence, consider Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. Acknowledge His love and His power. As a believer you have identified with Him, you have given Him your life and your life has been hidden in Him. The Holy Spirit lives in you. Areas where you have not forgiven are areas you have not surrendered to the One who loves you. Pray out loud, “Lord Jesus, please forgive me for trying to save my life, for not trusting you.” Humble yourself.

 4. Remember the words of Jesus: “Father forgive them— they know not what they are doing.” These are eternal words, and He has given them to you. The Eternal One is willing to release the power of those words again through you. 

5. Think of the person who hurt you and what that person did. Let yourself feel the pain. Forgiveness takes a deeper hold on us as we forgive from the place of pain. To say you forgive while denying the pain does not deal with the root. Once you have gotten in touch with the pain, say out loud:

“In the name of Jesus, I forgive __________ for _______.” 

Say the name of the person or describe the person (the man with the dark jacket who attacked me outside of my home two years ago). Then be very specific in what you are forgiving the person for. There are at least two reasons to say it out loud. First, it helps you focus and keeps you from being vague. Second, you can listen to yourself. You can tell if you are being real or not. If you trust the person praying with you, you may ask him or her to help you be specific. If that person has discernment or empathy, he or she may be able to give you words that help you. For example, 

“I forgive _______ for humiliating me and rejecting me and making me feelworthless.” 

Have your friend pray that the love of God would release you and make you a vessel of His love. Repeat these steps if others come to your mind whom you need to forgive. If you have difficulty speaking declarations of forgiveness, try speaking to the Lord about your hurt and pain. Let Him lead you to the place of forgiveness. He will. I suggested this to Lydia, who did not believe she could forgive her parents or even say the words. I asked her to tell Jesus how angry and hurt she was. She later told me she tried to say, “I don’t want to forgive them,” but instead the words “I forgive my parents” came out. As she prayed, God worked through her. Upon saying the words she began to weep and express sorrow that her parents were never loved and did not know any better. “I realized how miserable they were,” she said, glimpsing their own pain for the first time. Ask God to bring others to your mind. One or two is plenty to start with, since you need to be willing to touch the pain. (You may find that you need to take the next step of renunciation, which is found in the next chapter.) Remember, we should not ask for more than we are willing to give. With every blessing God brings into our life comes the responsibility to use it in accordance with His plan for us. 

6. Give thanks to God for His goodness, and ask Him to direct your paths. Use your newfound freedom to love someone in a practical way. The fruit of forgiveness is love.

112.1 SEEL imaginations into the birth of Jesus. . . ❤️💞😇👍

I pray with You Jesus for me to Be All you have prepared me for. 

• Jesus has taken care of me since
  
  
  Covid. He has really ALWAYS protected me. But after Covid it has really been incredible, as I got a job, just when I needed a new bike or to hire an attorney…but then set free!
• Today I learned I’ve buried something you know about:
• https://www.focusonthefamily.com/episodes/broadcast/improve-yourself-improve-your-relationships/
• I’m not yet sure what it includes. But I know I need to Forgive my family!?!?
• https://www.intouch.org/listen/radio/forgiving-one-another-part-3
• Yes these two podcasts . are on every morning 5-6am on TheJoyFM.com … it is always on point .for everything in my life. These verses and lessons are always so strong for me. And I step into this, knowing how God has been leading me into more and more every day into something more.
• I’m doing the Prayerline again 4-5am Wds, Fr & Sn

And of course, I keep reading into my prayer books this morning. I always start with these Podcasts, and then open my daily readings, which include the Consecration to St Joesph book and this, that I get every month now. 

Of course, this is where I got the Hebrew verse, posted above. But again stepping into God’s Wisdom and Glory to recognize that there is something about my past that I buried. And instead of finding and forgiving some karma, I’ve been caught into these obstacles of Doubt and Fear. 

This is really so powerful for me, as I realize now how my dad will be here .. tomorrow and my son has lost it yesterday. And now again in my space and time the random experience of sharing God’s Beauty and Love, in His Son dying to share and teach whatever could be next for me. And suddenly, I have this typo “Ely,” and see my mother name? Of course, I couldn’t erase or correct this. . . 

Why is my mom showing up for me now? Could it be to understand why I feel lost in doubt and fear about some karma I have hidden deep down inside about my mom.  Yes, “About my  Mom?”

And yes I can write and share more carefully and more focused than ever. Of course, this does not have the beauty and pizzazz that can be found in my handwritten text, but this is autocorrected, typed perfectly and spelled correctly which allows easier reading and understanding. Even when my words are really scribbled here very sloppy most all the time.

I confess, I struggle to stay slow and focused all the time. It's really a challenge for me. And I do realize that “slow and steady” really works better for math and spelling and all sorts of things that I do, and like to do. Like making this blog sing with clarity and focus, comes better with slow steady writing, especially with my pen. I often wonder how can I possibly continue to move forward when there seems to be an onslaught of chaos before me each day.

This is where I need to start in the next section of my SEEL work. Making the transition to express the deeper imagination experiences that I have . . . It’s really where I always am, seeing and feeling things sorta beyond everything around me. It’s really like I’m  never alone, always feeling, hearing, and imagining some collective of angels around me. It’s really neat as any name that comes up, I’ll see their face, and get comforted. Just like a second ago when I typed my mom’s name “Ely,” and instantly I felt her along with other mother figures, Joyce, Dawn, Joni, Jesus, and even St. Mary all here flashing looks and images before me as if they all came to visit.

Just typing “saint” brought the feeling and imagery of Saint Michael, where I’d see his sword of protection around us all. I guess it’s really cool for me, as I visualize it all at once, together. Very different images and people flashing in concert as each name comes and goes in my minds eye.

Then the assignment in Ignatian Imaginative Prayers is to imagine the Birth of Jesus and the trip of Joseph and Mary to Bethlehem, which is now in synchronous to the Exodus Readings, which included this prayer so intimate and clear for me in this moment: 

Let us remember that we are in the loving presence of God. Trust in his mercy as you come close to him today. Take one minute of silence now, praying for God’s blessing on you, your family, fraternity, and all Exodus Men.

I am created to do something or to be something for which no one else is created; I have a place in God’s counsels, in God’s world, which no one else has; whether I be rich or poor, despised or esteemed by man, God knows me and calls me by my name. I have my mission. Somehow, I am necessary for His Purposes. I have a part in this Great Work; I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good, I shall do His Work. O Lord, I give myself to Thee. I trust Thee wholly. Deign to fulfill Thy High Purposes in me whatever they be—work in and through me. I am born to serve Thee, to be Thine, to be Thy instrument. Amen.

Great is your mercy, O Lord; give me life according to your justice. 

What we have here now is you stepping more strongly into this spiritual experience, more and more each day. You were able to exercise today and yesterday, but not yet bike, swim or Sun today. The exercises were all at least 20 reps each, and it was one of your best times to stay in silence. You are always discounting these completely unique experiences that you are able to complete. Like moments ago, you received a Kim note from the Apple Pic App, and you sent the newly found “WHAT IF” letter that you wrote last year. This was from an exercise with your Welcome Team. Then you also shared this note with your son and daughter. These events are very significant and truly remarkable. 

I was so surprised to see something so strong and specific for Kimberly with her Birthday Notes still warm, 5/30. And I immediately FLASHED to her being here with me again, restored to her position and I was very quick and direct doing everything she suggested. We were in the Prayer and Light with Jesus moving forward together in Spirit. We accepted all the gifts and blessings before us, ready to step more fully into training and supporting everyone we met. Just as God directed us from the very beginning. You see, everything I “Flash” into is like seeing the Mozart Picture on the wall, and each second I imagine and look at it, it becomes a live video bringing more and more details in the first little picture I see. Of course, as I write again now, the FLASH of Kim has grown to include the grant job at SPC that I interviewed for last week. We were training teachers, healing professionals, bringing more focus and direction to the city youth. It was an incredible moment of synchronicity where the moment of creation was real and apparent for all of us.

We always love when you FLASH into a new more powerful vision of creation as it evolves before your eyes. And again you need to add these experiences into your story and make it full and complete. Having the pretty and important words is perfect, but the links are missing and are needed. The Examples and dynamics that you experienced, and know, and understand also need to be present and clear throughout your presentation.

I was so delighted to fall into this experience as I consider the SEEL Day 1 Lessons Luke 2:1-7 about the Love and Glory of Joseph and Mary traveling through the dessert and mountains to Bethlehem for the birth of our Savior. The challenges through the terrain are incredible compared to the pushing of this keyboard that I am complaining about now. And now I see a crack completely accross this screen before me. No excuse to feel sorry for myself, as the extreme bizarre experience I feel is how much Jesus Leads me to now, testing and training me to be slow and patient. And how Joseph and Mary felt, as if anything could be expressed or shared beyond our understanding. There is no comparison here. Nothing I have been challenged with this week or month or year could compare.

My first feeling and insight with Joseph and Mary, was how God explained Creation to me with e=mc2, where at any moment their next steps taken forward could be onto clouds, that carried them miles in a moment. Then I know they stopped to rest. And I could feel the wild animals bringing them food and comfort on their trip. Suddenly water bubbling up before them, where the hot spring bubbles up into a perfect rounded foot pool next to a stone smoothed out as a seat. How Blessed the whole experience would be to share in these moments with God, sharing the love and divine life passing through this very moment with us. Trusting and loving God this moment as we move forward, how wondrous must it have been for Joseph and Mary to travel so far with God.

Take your time with this. You have the ability to see and understand so much more. The concept of energy and matter being in a state of flux, where one moment they are struggling with steps on hard stone, and the very next moment they step onto a puffy white cloud that carries them away. These conceptions and imagination is simply beyond anything on Earth. Your direct personal experience with these things provide you a very unique and powerful experience. Like you have frequently had experiences where time stands still, and many more that you still refuse to discuss.

Yes, I was stunned to read this passage from Luke now as it ends with the facts of their experience that there was no guest room available to them. And this mirrors my immediate experience completing my website describing the gifts of God (actual guest rooms that I offer here) that I am able to share in my home.  I am making every effort to define each shared space and how much I can provide with it. And now again I am challenged to include all the experiences of my Journey to share Christ, where this whole life and all these gifts are part of His plan.

What is more powerful than anything is how strong you are moving forward to share these gifts anyway you can possibly do it. Now again accepting that the hand motions of your pen are as fundamental to this experience as each new revelations coming to you.

I now return to SEEL Day Two to repeat the exercise of “imagining into” the birth and light of Christ Jesus in the manger. And I'm an ANT, with front row seats. Watching the love of angels and royalty sharing the blessing of the awesome light.

We delight in sharing this light with you as you step more strongly forward. Son remain fearless, you are always in the right place at the right time, you have been perplexed by the graces received over and over again. And now more than ever you are suspended by love and Grace, be at peace and keep moving forward.

I started today with my cracked and damaged iPad Pro and now again I'm on my iPad. I reread and revised and repaired my written work here to get clarity and focus. And I have revised and fixed my story and website that I've been working on simultaneously. So now I'm able to review and continue with my SEEL work, where the next verses from the Bible are about how beautiful and awesome God is. How the lowly poor shepherds are given the greatest blessing and benefit to have this experience with the angels.

I find it interesting how the book says he is surrounding himself with people. I would say more that Jesus seeks the poor and even avoids people. He is always trying to share with the sick and destitute, which is more beyond and away from the people. Yes, in fact I would say that Jesus seeks more the outcasts and those pushed away from the people.

I guess what was interesting to me again here when I considered the Lectio Divina for DAY 3 Luke:2 8-20 and really consider the words and phrases that struck strongly with me. . . I notice that I first highlighted them singing “Glory to God in the Highest.”

And I feel that this is my perfect phrase for today. As it’s all exactly as the Lord has told me about . . . Which I continue to ponder in my heart: I knew I had to get back into my Exodus Habits, and started the Day with Exodus App, then heard FamilyFocus and Charles Stanley as I did my 20 reps with the weights and all. I knew I had to ride my bike to catch the Sunrise at 6:34 today and started out as Stanley was finishing. I knew I had to swim too, and when I got to Coffeepot with the Mangrove’s and it was only 10 after six. So I parked and walked in the water thinking I might swim before, instead of after the Sunrise.

I Picked up some trash and then back on my bike down to the volleyball courts where I could sit out on the pier there. Watching the busy birds chirping at me from all directions. Course, it was a cloudy morning and I thought maybe I would go back and swim instead. So I stretched and got myself doing circles and feeling deep into the Earth. Until I saw the first little break of Sunshine over the clouds and got into my prayers. About halfway through the Sun was out strong, so I did my first cycle all the way through. When I was done the Sun was full and clear above the clouds so I did The Lords Prayer again allowing the Sun deep into my eyes having this wonderful light and beauty filling my heart again now!

Now again in this next Bible Verse for DAY  4 Matthew 2:1-12 I was caught by the direct experiences with God, and the beauty and blessing of being filled with His Light. I really felt that this morning out with the Sun myself. But reading this now, I could imagine how the Star they followed would seemingly be sitting on the stable He was in. Like as if it were this giant street light right above the door in the eyes of the Magi. 

Of course, king harod likely couldn’t see the star at all, or certainly not distinguish one from another. While the Magi were blessed with dreams of God visiting them in additional to the wonders of the fruit of the spirit in this moment filled with joy and peace. As I imagine the moment of divinity they shared seeing the body Jesus, it must have been like staring deep into the center of the star... Recognizing that they are marveling at a child, but the radiance and beauty of the All Mighty is so much more.

I am reminded of my own experience saying the Lords Prayer this morning as the sun shown deep into my soul. I love doing my Yoga with the sunrise and the beauty of God all around me. I always want to jump right in the water next! Now DAY  5 with Isaiah 52:7-10

To consider this verse with the nativity scene is like really amplifying my last few words. To see the beauty and majesty of God, who reigns overall in this incredible moment of light and salvation. Where all this majesty comes together in the star of the birth of Christ. . . . like the Earth and the sunrise in my one moment with Christ this morning. . . Wow all the ends of creation coming back in on top of itself in my wonder of this moment!

I always have the sense that His second coming was at Pentecost and that he sent his Holy Spirit to live with us now. So there’s not anything else coming, but it all is about us following through with here and now, being real about Christ living here with us now. I always feel like the revelation in the end of times is more of a story about everybody else who doesn’t choose to live with Jesus now! It’s all God wrath on those foolish enough to miss the boat!