105 SEEL Greater Service to God! 💕💖💗💕💕💖💕

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

I'm so grateful to have this experience. I'm always so surprised by my opportunities and everything that happens to me each day. I'm listening to Fr. Gaitley speaking about his book the 33 Days to Morning Glory. Yea, I'm at Lisette's now where our group is deep into this book. I just got an invite to lunch with Dr Jim, so I am really surprised and exited about it all. And how Mary has been so strong and focused to bring us to Christ. And we can't plan things like this . . . 

That’s What we have shared with you all the time. Accepting this gift we have for you. The cross you bear is more than you can write or share, and again you recognize how you can bring more light to those.

Now the word before me is so strong and focused. I'm really challenged to know and share what is before me, as so much is here. You are always putting so much before me. I wonder about how I can honor all you share. And I guess speaking of this truth and passion is beautiful.

What else did you do?

I started with morning mass, and then visited with Lisette, when I started this page. Then lunch with Jim was cool. Getting to know each more and speaking about church and our own growth. I told him about my experience with Dick in the morning. We both know Dick and share our growth and learning with him, so it was easy for us to speak about our own growth and challenges.

DAY 1: Prayerfully read the traditional translation of the Principle and Foundation that follows. Ask: How do I concretely praise, love, and serve God? What activities, people, or material things help me achieve this end?

I see my primary task now in serving God is to write and share as much as possible. I have recognized this task before me for a really long time. It's interesting as it has come and gone as a priority. Children, wife and work have taken their place here over and over again. Now in my silence and privacy I have witnessed how much more important it has become for me to write and share. The discourse about Principle and Foundation speaks of "indifference" to health & sickness, wealth & poverty. I agree to being indifferent to the events of life, while being responsible for the gifts I have from God, really must include conscious choices to eat and work as necessary to sustain my good health and wealth. It would be disrespectful and disingenuous to become a glutton exploiting my health and wealth.

I readily accept what comes before me and honor everyone I meet, without priority or with indifference, but respect and acceptance. This can often be a challenge and I've been as focused as possible to do as best as I can. I know I've still not turned-on my server or have I explored other means of sharing and publishing. I wonder now if I have accepted what is easiest for me and not pushed into new areas as much as I should. I have been trying to do more at church and realize my own limitations.

What we are waiting for is the power and focus you are really capable of. You act and feel as a child so easily and have the ability to play into that. This truth and experience you carry and share is important. 

I get it and I stay in Your Word throughout my day! 5:57:57 12/14/2024 Like today the Exodus reading was clear and focused: 

During his time among us, Jesus was very active and involved, full of wise words and good works, healing, initiating apostolic action, and carefully training his disciples. He loved the world deeply despite its corruption. However, he always viewed this world in light of where it was heading; his gaze was set on, “the new world, when the Son of man shall sit on his glorious throne” (Matthew 19:28). The throne Jesus speaks about is a symbol for the divine rule of God, that blessed time when everything on earth will conform to God’s will, and all death, sin, fear, and injustice will be banished.

Let us remember our true hope in God’s coming kingdom and ask God for a full measure of the joy that filled the heart of Christ, “who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2).

God is coming to save you, renewing the wilderness of your heart.

I have this Word with me daily!  My “in the woods” wildness seems to be where I belong most of all. As you just said wanting me to be as the child again.

DAY 2: How have I been a good steward of the gifts God has given me, including created things, my talents, and my abilities? From my own experience, what gets in the way of my praising, loving, and serving God? How do the following influence my choices and actions: titles, honors, possessions, career, opinion of others, lifestyle? Be as concrete as possible.

I get it, as I follow your Word! A few weeks ago when the crew were picking up all the brush outside from the hurricanes, I went and pulled out a big steel BBQ pit that my neighbor had out in his pile. Yes, that couldn't go with all the brush.  It’s been out at the curb ever since. So today I went and measured it and then moved it to my tent space by my container. It was the right size to rebuild my composting corner to allow my mixer and all to work with the big old bath tub I had there.

Yes, creativity and talents recycling trash to make something work better. You see I got a big bunch of veggies this morning, I started my turkey soup and made my root veggie salad, and filled my sink with beautiful compost fixings. Yes, I have my steel mixer and drum the welder made for me, but that is great for mixing soil not chopping compost. So now with the steel BBQ pit holding up the steel bathtub, I can use my steel mixer to chop up stuff to put in to the plastic compost bin. I have three of the plastic city compost bins. I'm sure neighbors threw them in the trash. So now my new compost set-up is ready to rock and roll. 

So I swallow my pride, and pickup trash to build another widget. My yard, house, and life is filled with them. I was thrilled at the farmers market today. Eva has dozens of plants out for sale now, and there is more and more yummy organics everywhere. It felt like home, even the music got me jamming a bit. I always feel like there is so much coming together here for me. Yesterday I went to pick-up a truck load of brush and as I drove out to venician isles I could see so much of the area had flooded. There were no sidewalks and I kept "seeing" the moving sidewalks taking all the flood waters away. 

When loading the truck with Dr. Jim we even spoke about it and Addys said how her daughter was doing patent reviews. What? It was really inspiring to see my one contact with Dr Jim and Lisette would be with someone who needed and could understand some of my junk with Jesus. I've always wondered why I did certain things. Like rebuilding my compost seemed so far out there. And I guess not really, as I've done so many other things that just "showed-up" and walked through the process before me with complete

indifference.

We have been doing this with you for a long time. Your ability to listen and follow is very significant. As you never required an angel or a burning bush. You have stepped into so much just naturally, trusting what was before you and allowing things to happen fearlessly. . 

DAY 3: Read Exodus 3:1-15. Consider how God calls Moses to partner with God in the work of liberation: "I will send you to Pharaoh to bring my people, the Israelites, out of Egypt." Reflect on your own life: How have I partnered with God to help people, to build a more just and gentle world, to care for creation?

I guess I have followed the Word most of my life! And of course I've been districted and confused plenty of times too. But I've seen over and over again that I always end up in the right place at the right time. It often happens that I'm totally clueless, and even scared or insecure about my next steps or place in the mix. But somehow I'm always getting ahead or doing something that seemingly no one else can do?!?

I do feel like I am being followed or watched all the time! And equally protected as well. I wanted to get my server on this weekend, but then discovered another website much the same as my own, sharing and disclosing something for everyone to learn and understand. I then realized there really are several that I know and reference often. So maybe my place and purpose here with this is something else.

This too has happened countless times. Where I work and focus on one thing and then discover it really is nothing about what I thought. Like I feel I've not done what I need to do but in fact my delay or distraction was critically important to allow me to be in the right place at the right time for something completely different than I was anticipating. Like now again, I'm really not convinced that I have any idea why I came to St. Pete in the first place. I feel I am in the right place all the time but still really have no clue. This morning, I realized it was only 10 days until Christmas and felt this time alone would be wonderful for me to get ready for whatever could be next.

DAY 4: Repetition. As you consider again Ignatius's Principle and Foundation, recall moments in your life when you felt in balance and times when you felt out of balance. In other words, recall times of great spiritual freedom and moments of spiritual chaos. Whom do you look up to as people living in spiritual freedom?

I really have only met some women who seem spiritually free, like my mom and Joyce. Joyce was really a second mom for me. . . And they both recognized something in me, that I 'm still tying to understand. Then no one I ever met seemed to have more spiritual freedom than I do.  It doesn't always feel like a gift as I've been in St. Pete for 5 full years, and I still wonder what I'm here for. It seems clear I belong here, as I've been gifted and graced all that need, whenever I need it. And the real chaos has only been a concern when I tried to do something or plan something on my own. I am in chaos whenever I get impatient and anxious about where I am and what I need to do or not  do.

Maybe this is all about teaching you to wait and be patient: What do you think of that?? 

I  don’t know? I trust you Jesus, say what you would have me do, guide me and direct me to achieve as you require of me. .

DAY 5: In the light of your prayer over the past three days, write out the Principle and Foundation in your own words-that is, write out the mission statement that you want to govern your life. Or create an image reflecting your Principle and Foundation (see, for example, Jeremiah 17:5-11).

I  do have my Exodus 90 Why Statement that I've updated and see most every day: To slowly listen and love God in joy, gratitude and Peace! 

DAY 6

Read Philippians 4:11-13 ("I can do all things through him who strengthens me"). Continue working on your own Principle and Foundation . . . 

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

104.1 SEEL Spiritual Freedom

104.1 SEEL

The InTouch podcast, focused on how "humility" should be our goal .., I am outside with my iPad on my hammock. This old dirty hammock has been ripped up a bit. I put it into the washing machine, it didn't really get any clearer but the tears got worse.

I have not written much lately, and I realize my personal journalling should really be separated from the SEEL work that I need to do. It's weird writing now outside in the sunshine. Sometimes my scribbles are typed perfectly and then the very next line nothing comes out even close.

This Peace with Jesus is about being undisturbed, real and genuine; unanxious with the crazy events of my life. Content in all life, with Trusting Jesus in all things. Sustaining peace has been consistent, and I really feel lucky, as I've learned to just smile and go along.

Charles Stanley is talking about people being "Exalted" for service or something. I guess this really brings me back to where I started: “those who are given much, much is expected." attention… “To whom much is given, much is expected” . . . I went back to SEEL 101 to find this bold text I posted above, and so I decided to keep them both. I noticed I have the same words, but it’s slightly different. It feels like something I need to explore deeper. I guess it’s an added pronoun for “those.” Now, I struggle and fight with my tasks and responsibly. Now we read and study about mother Mary who completely submitted herself to God. 

And I guess this brings me back to my prodigal son story. Submitting my life to Jesus where all my will and expertise were given to Spirit. As weird as it seems I've already written about how I needed to find my old Journals so I can better understand how I had done this. What is strange now is that I scanned all the pages when the house sold in Seminole Heights. I did look through all my digital records and never found any of it. Then I was cleaning off my back porch and found a big wooden box that would work great to store the Journal pages. Yes, guided to do the same thing again. It’s obvious to me how much U get guided all the time, but I guess it’s important to share and explain these moments. Yes, when I moved in here, I found all my old Journals still in boxes that I had. Course I piled them all in the garage and never opened one.

I know l had to revise some of my commitments when l came home from the hospital in 1980. I'm not sure how successful I have been. I remember telling Jesus that He brought me back to do something here and now, so I didn't want any airy-fairy stuff coming through to me. With all that I've been through and seen before me, seeing Angels and Spirits seems like it would have helped instead of hurt.  So I have kinda asked to revise our commitments, though I'm not entirely sure I was successful. I mean my discernment might have been clearer and stronger with wings and halos. I tend to trust everyone too easily and accept what shows up as my next responsibility in Christ.

I guess that is why I need to stay alone at home now. I have nothing to do but write and share in Christ Jesus. I try to clean and stay focused about my place and responsibility. And it's never really clear to me. The been doing a lot of reading and not much else. 

3:58:49pm. 12/9/2024 I finished my classes on Friday. I didn't know my grades were due but luckily I was almost done with everything when I got a call from the office. I asked Lynn to help and it was all done in no time. I have done more since then, but I don't know what to do next.

2:05:53 pm 12/10/2024  Keeping peace with us always Ephesians 4, rejoice in the Lord always. I never felt trapped by my materialism. I always feel so much responsibility to be productive with all I am given. I see my time now as a way of escaping all my chores, writing, and learning instead of redoing my compost, plants, and gardens.. I still feel like I have so much to do. And I know I have to do these lessons. I know I am rich and I wonder if it will be gone next month. I have a hearing date February 20th about the house. Yes, 1420 on 20th Ave will be in court which all full like it's done already when I see these numbers all line up. Like peace is a gift from God to is my home and all God has given to me. So in peace I can accept all that GOD has given to me and know my work here will never finish through This freedom I have been granted.

Now, I need to repeat this last reading again. And as I read this over again I wondered how to apply it more to myself. Course I've never really "trusted" in riches beyond anything else, but have trusted God to bring me through. The riches have helped, and really have always just shown up as needed. But it's never been a priority, or even something that I really pursued. Funny, what comes to mind was when I first started working. Like when I come to St. Pete I was in a house in no time. I don't think I was in my new job for a full month and I was moving into a house. And then every time Colleen got pregnant I lost a job, where the new job was set within the week. Business just came so easy for me. Like, I remember how many times I've just told people how to do things, and solved all their problems with No invoice, no consulting or anything. Of course, what comes to mind now was when the county engineer asked me to this meeting with a bunch of developers, engineers, and attorneys. “What’s the model going to do here” . . . Easy peezy for me, but I could see that blew the place to pieces.

Philippians 3:7-16. Pray for St. Paul's single-minded and single-hearted focus on Christ. Ask: When have I experienced or witnessed such focus, such freedom in my life? When have I experienced or witnessed such focus, such freedom in my life? LOL, When have I NOT witnessed such focus, such freedom in my life? Seems like once again getting new words and definitions for things I’ve always known and always done.

I had a visit with Kay, and then Kevin called almost to confirm the joy of helping his wife on Monday. We spoke a lot, or I was able to speak with them both a lot. It brought me back to my Welcome witnessing and I had to find my blog posting about it which was really wicked kewl. I found it and discovered it was the transcripts from my conversation explaining it all to my Spiritual Director. 

It was a great blissing to read though it all again. And to see or realize how much has come from it, or how for I've gone since then. I feel like I've done a lot to prepare and step into something more and new and stronger than ever 
before.

Read John 3:22-30. Reflect on John the Baptist's freedom: "He must increase, but I must decrease." How have I demonstrated such freedom and other-centeredness? Where in my life do I still need to let go of excessive self-preoccupation and control?

I’m not sure if I have done this much at all. I know I've been inspired and dive into things with great focus and ambition. And I've seen and learned as necessary and then move on as necessary easily too. I've been perplexed lately as l have so many great opportunities, and have so many resources beyond my understanding. I've lost control of most all things. And recognize how much I still need to do.

.

103.2 SEEL: asked for strength, love and wisdom

DAY 5 SEEL 103.2 12:18:23 11/12/24

Read Romans 8:26-27. Prayer can be a struggle sometimes, but find consolation in the assurance that the Spirit helps us pray in our weakness. Where do you feel weak in your life now?

Wow does that sound like a loaded gun. I’ve always asked for strength, love and wisdom, and I realize now you only get strong by bumping into challenges. Then of course, wisdom grows with an intellectual challenge. . . So I see how my life of asking for these have kept me busy. I know that’s part of my growing now is stepping beyond the past and moving onto something new. That was a whole idea of switching from Methodist to Catholic. I realize that was a change that would shift everything in my life.

I know I was right on target again. As noted here we really "know not what to pray.” And I guess this allows for the intercession of the Saints, which is really where I was at earlier this week. This again makes it very clear that I'm in the right place at the right time again. So guess this is really about refining my prayers for me!  I realized that I've really never prayed for people specifically. I guess I really never knew how to pray. So my prayer life might’ve included people in my consciousness, or that was concerned about people, but specific prayers for people haven’t been real until the last month or so. I realize I am more in service than ever. I guess that’s what Jesus said to us in the first place, that to lead and to guide means to be a servant to others. Thank God, we have Saints that make intercessions for us, cause I don’t know how I could do this myself!

What’s the next one?

Read Ephesians 3:14-21 (The power of Christ at work within us is able to accomplish more than we can ask or imagine). Where do you find that awesome power at work in your life? Where do you need such a divine, dynamic Presence?

Wow, A find the awesome Power of God everywhere in my life. This morning the family focus podcast talked about how I raised my children. It was so cool to hear. Doctors talk about giving children responsibilities. Of course, I was working at home as a consultant, so I always had tasks to do all the time everywhere. Yes, Projects-for-Credit!!! Or they call it experiential education now, lol!!! And I was making too much money, so I was always able to do whatever they wanted to do. “Oh another trip to Disney that means we have to do the laundry first, and clean up the house, and get ready to go. What else do we have to do guys?”

I always felt my kids were so spoiled. We had Larry Park Zoo passes. We had Florida Aquarium passes. We had Busch Gardens passes. We went to Disney every Christmas. It was insane. Of course, I had to get them kayaks and bikes, and everything else. Oh, what was so fun was they decided what to do and then always laid out all the tasks before we could get there. So I really felt blessed starting the day and sharing this Family Focus Podcast with my children. And getting to the men’s group just in time to help make coffee. And then I even was able to do the service at the church with Father Kevin. I asked him if he was doing OK, because someone mentioned at another service to pray for him; he laughed; No idea what for, but appreciated it.

Now I’m talking to my iPad, it’s working better than ever. It’s the same day that I go see the Saint Pete College IT guy. . . Of course it’ll be great to get all things fixed and working right. My Bike guy called about fixing my bike, so I think he’ll be here sometime. Then Mike needs a model done in Tampa so we’re meeting at Front Porch on Thursday. Wow, a good meal and a good beer, Can’t argue with that. It all feels like a beautiful blessing. It’s funny I was talking today after the men’s group., about all this legal crap. It’s like I’m mixing things up and getting ready for another shift, where everything just falls into place.. I’m still totally dumbfounded by the RFKjr video and I know that they’ll have a serious fight to get that done.

But the greed machine is a big lie and a big deception. That’s all talk. It’s all about fear. They’ll try to do something crazy and they’ll get caught red-handed. It’s about time. Funny how I just know it!

DAY 7
Review the week; savor the graces or return to a passage that was particularly meaningful for you. Recognize the Graces that God shares each moment, and I realize it is really beyond comprehension sometimes. So I met with the Lead Service Tech at St Pete College and he owns the same machines I have at home to well. Of course, he was really happy to help, and spent a few hours with me playing with my machines. It was really cool because he was able to get things working and show me other things. Like my MacBook actually had two operating systems or three operating system systems, including widows, that I could switch through. So they have the original that came with it and that has the Adobe Suite 6, which is just perfect anyway. Then I’ve got the latest and greatest operating system that I can use the new Adobe suite with the school. And of course, he set up the new Adobe suite on my iPad Pro too. So now I’m finally learning Photoshop. It was almost funny how easy it was for him.

I mean, that’s really just beyond belief to me. I’ve had this machine for over 10 years and I’m back to the original software and then the latest and the greatest software, I can go back-and-forth between them if I want. I guess that means it’s time I gotta turn on my Power Mac. He’s got one of those too said he was just using it for a server for a while, which is what I was thinking. My head is spinning how awesome things fall together.

5:30am 11/13/24 Psalm 119:74,81,114 I wait . . . . Waiting on the Lord to get me lean what I need to be. Were I get instep with God’s timing, everything is in concert and I have inner Peace and Joy. Ya a new day with Charles Stanley https://www.intouch.org/listen/radio/when-it-is-wise-to-wait-part-1a

God’s purpose is to grow us up, to be like Jesus, creating opportunities to learn patiences.

103.1 Wow Jesus has bike again for my real work here in Exodus

Now again, I start a new SEEL Week 3 that speaks about the intimacy of prayer and as usual all things coincide and support my work deeper into Christ. Yesterday the divine chaplet reading was also really focused and strong to me, like the last SEEL verse Jeremiah 18:1-6, where I see and know I'm reworked almost every day. . . And it’s always my own direct personal challenge. It reminds me of coming home as a prodigal son, I was demanding clarity and focus to step into. I had no need or desire to return, having convinced myself I had already beaten the machine. I remember accepting that God wanted me here and returning was about returning to Eden. I'm thinking now I need to go back and find my first Journal pages to see what I wrote.

I came to this with the Divine Mercy meeting. We always start with sharing our blessings, and I knew everyone had already heard or helped me through my last bike accident, so I didn't want to say anything. Lisette finally asked me specifically. I started out saying that I finally learned I had hit a neighbor’s truck and had enough understanding to submit an auto insurance claim. On the phone trying to submit, she asked the date of the accident and I had to look up the report at the hospital. And then when I opened it, I noticed they had already zeroed out all the fees. Wow, she said, “three days in the hospital dismissed, that’s a real blessing.”

After reviewing our blessings together we started talking about our readings and what we learned there. So I knew how my sharing had only started.  Yes, bringing me back to my first line in SEEL work: “To whom much is given, much is expected.”  So here sharing this moment as well with JOYFM just shared glad TIDINGS, where the mic picked up Candice talking on the radio: “you’re hanging out with us; Maverick city with a song that uses one of the names for God that’s listed in the Bible. The name is Jireh meaning he is our provider” that was so cool cause the radio came through on this microphone. 

Now random beta feedback to apple: having the space to write makes everything easier,  make everything work right and I forget that I can talk to it too. It is really cool if I get the music going as well, but then to be able to do everything together. Explaining what is not working just right yet. I know talking to the machine such a blessing. Everything is such a blessing. So if I can explain it with my voice, while you see the scribbles on the screen. What use is video without the sound… my words got stuck here a dozen times in this last paragraph

 . . . So talking about our readings greater things are expected from me. Thus, I admitted how my next witness had to be the prodigal story from my first bike accident in high school. It was also the prodigal story I heard in my first Welcome Weekend that I attended, when I knew I had to witness. Then the reconciliation with Father Kevin the next day, brought me back to the lessons with him and being barefoot. So I had to do the witness for Fr. Kevin and my Mom's Sermon. I presented after 10pm and felt like I really fumbled, but RFKjr perfectly repeated the same truth the next day. Now our reading about the prodigal brings me back to a witness about me, instead of just about my mom. Which is what Kevin said to me, about Sharing about me, instead of hiding all the time. 

Now again, I start with a new Bible verse for SEEL Week 3 Luke 11:1-13, that starts with the intimacy of the Lords prayer and what it is that we ask for. Again always the power and focus is about loving our Father. The greatest blessing of being a father is providing for children and a family. And of course, I always feel that is where I will end up again; Married with children. I deeply understand the ask and the desire to answer to bring great fulfillment to the father. And for me to be able to write this experience as it happens here before my eyes is another great blessing of no bike working! Knowing the complete blessing I have now again in Christ alone, brings such awesome insights. But here and now, I know it's about honoring this place and time that Jesus has given to me.

Wow, what is weird is knowing Jesus has been asking me to get on my bike again. And I wonder if that is just a distraction from my real work here. Put two patches on and it still leaks, knowing the love I share here is where I belong. Now adding another patch ;-/

And of course that is what the Exodus reading was about today too: OUR WORK! Doing our work! The fact that he promises to make them fishers of men, highlighting their original trade, seems to imply that they were quite excellent at it. And I guess my continuous challenge has been stepping into whatever God calls me to do . . . Because I’m good at it!! . . . .  Teaching, sharing, and writing about it . . . Biking and working, teaching, learning… uhg, WRITING! Yes, writing more every day!

And I know that's why I'm always challenged to ask for more, since I always ask for the same thing, I know I need more Strength, Love, & Wisdom - what I’ve asked for. Returning to Eden is no small task, and I stepped into every task before me, never really knowing where it was going, or what could be next. But ready to step in. I mean like now I'm teaching again and I just found out the professor I am helping wrote her PhD on experiential education. . . . Which I realize is something that I essentially created.

Which is the whole point, that its all for the love of God.  God’s work, God’s gift , God’s insight, God’s opportunity, it’s all God, so I just want the love of God, I want to fulfill His Eden, create and share the love and experience that He’s created for us, and to have it exactly the way that He imagined with that first spark. 2:02:21 11/9/2024 and again now I learn how its still new and He is creating with us this very moment. Which really means GoD'S Eden could even be the challenge of training and experience that we created In an AirBnB scout trip, mangrove planting, or bike ride.

So now the Next Verse for SEEL Isaiah 55:1-13 has another strong question: Are you able to be still and simply listen to God, in Scripture and in the deepest desires of your heart? And of course it all goes back to my deepest desires again. What did I ask for? What did I really want? What was my real passion about? What was my real goal? Can I be that specific?

What does it really mean to want to be in The Garden of Eden? How can I restore something that has never left us? How do I go back into something that has evolved and grown into something new? I think about the Jehovah Witness where John is now and how they have some picture of life on earth when Jesus comes back, literally the lamb with the lion.

Isn’t all scripture really about having our deepest desire becoming God? Not that we become God ourselves, but our deepest desire is to love God, become part of God, share with God. I guess it’s really ourselves having the experience of love. Being, sharing, and feeling that deepest most pure holy love that is God: Father, Son & Holy Ghost!! 

Ok so I guess I read this next verse before I posted it. So listening to the scripture here Is just a blessing again, with the waters of life bringing me into joy. Where the waters come forth, bringing abundant pardons, joys, great good in an everlasting covenant when we seek our Lord first! 

How cool is that?

I mean, I’m just in the right place the right time again. And now I gotta be really careful and stay humble, even if I just say the obvious. Sure, I tried to fix my bike tire a dozen times now. But I also recognize How important it was to write. . . I mean, the farmers market ended two hours ago. I always try to get there when it starts. Which was eight hours ago.

Psalm 63:1-8 ("My soul thirsts for you"). What do you thirst for? How do you experience God's "steadfast love"?

Next verse for SEEL Psalm 63…. 4:19:29 11/9/24 I need to find and post. Ok so, I went to write in a paper journal and started to write what really belongs here. I always say or play like, I don't understand. But in all honesty I might be the only one who really understands. Like I know Jesus and how He guides and protects me all the time. I really have almost always known this and recognize it has been something really hard to share or discuss with anyone. It's not that I really need to, or ever really cared if anyone knows, or understands anything I do or write about anyway. I guess I know this is not really for me anyway, though I always seem to benefit whenever I return to read anything here. And in all truth I sometimes feel this is all for another race or species at another place and time. 

I've even thought before this was something God wanted done so that when it's all finished we can go back and read about something unique. I know there are thousands or millions who try to reach others and create real - change. Just like I sure there are millions who share with Jesus and write about it. But who am I to judge anyway, I will just keep writing and growing and hopefully someday this will all make sense to me or to someone. Love and God only for the sake of God for the sake of love. Love for the moment accepting this task, accepting the responsibility.

. Always thirsty for God, and bringing me back to the c waters that have always been my life. So the love and Joy - I have is always present as I continue to praise and pursue the Grace of God. And again this Verse reinforces all that I know and experience in life. As I experience and share in this love as best as I can to be and share all that I have. All things for the sake of GOD and all for the Glory of God. Surrendering the self to bring more love and experience in love.

My morning listening of Charles Stanley on intouch.org Brings me Back to the Glory of God again. He said that so clearly I recorded it, To share and wrote down this anyway. Guess the Holy Spirit is all about my Guardian Angels. I feel like it’s a room full of spirits because sometimes it sounds like my mom, and sometimes Joyce, and sometimes Joni, and even Emily and Christopher come through sometimes. 

So doing God‘s work now, and fulfilling God‘s life, is about accepting His guidance, energy and direction to step into this relationship  . . . With my guardian angels! My mother, a Trinity of women. . . Father, Son and Holy ghost! I guess it’s understanding the mystery that God is really divine and we’re all just branches together. I’m just a grape this week! And sometimes I’m a branch too though. It’s all about returning to Jesus, it’s all about love, Everyone is Love, that’s all we have here! 

Satan is the deception. It takes us away from love, like shutting off the light. The love is always there ready and waiting for us. I just sent in another Apple feedback video. Someone replied to me about fixing something for me. So I went and tried the color dropper again. Than wrote a long thank you letter to them in the reply. And explained the attached Video, where the stuck text is still there. with my stupid work around. And added other keyboard issues they never fixed. It sucks, since Steve died getting a beta fixed is a crapshoot. I’m lucky if they catch anything I tell them now, before IT’d be fixed the next day, not anymore. I seem to remember about a year ago, I was all excited about getting an update every week, but that only lasted a month or two, I'm sure that is written in my blogs too.

Last night with diner I found this video to watch about Saint Catherine of Siena. And she was doing exactly like I do and love . . . Now with the autocorrect working, the words here are better than what I was planning to say, because I was writing about myself Instead of the True Passion of Jesus. . .

So as usual, I’m overwhelmed with the opportunity and priority to be here and share and grow in Jesus. I remember when Covid first hit, and I could smell the scams a mile away. Like my boss sending the engineering team home after his board meeting at the hospital. I’m sure they all planned investing in Pfizer stock or something more sinister and pathetic. But I was called to ST Pete and was suddenly almost forced to ride my bike and discover what could be next.

I get the sense now that I'm still needing to bike with the sunrise, and plant mangroves, love the water and everything else I find. It was really remarkable how I ended up biking and learning for months After Covid. It Feels like more I need to step back and research in my Journals. Actually, this really feels like I’m about to do that again. Like the world‘s gonna stop again. It is the same song on the radio repeating the same story to let the healing begin.

Everything happens so quickly. Like I need to read and post the next SEEL verse: DAY 4 Read Psalm 103 ("Bless the LORD, O my soul"). Speak a similar psalm from your heart.

The deepest truth, knowing Jesus is that everything is a blessing when we understand HIS perspective on trying to make a bigger group. 

And I actually said grape instead of group; because I was envisioning the vine and being one of the branches, or this week one of the Grapes! It’s always about growing my love, everything about our experience comes back to that grow, grow, grow… 

In fact, from all of my experience, Jesus is really good at growing lots of grapes. I find myself trying to make wine now because I have so many grapes. Of course, playing like a grape, not working is easy too, but then I also recognize that my time and effort writing here is critical work as well.

What’s funny is that I’ve written a dozen emails, and text messages, and social media posts and all kinds of weird stuff while working here. I’ve actually joined X, and Neighborhood, and TikTok, and Rumble… I mean Bishop Barron has a Rumble! I actually followed a bunch of people too. And posted to Facebook and Instagram. Usually, the only thing I post on is LinkedIn…. The flood issues are all that I know about!

Of course, my last email was how much this is a trip into the twilight zone for me. Because my first HS accident dream was about a city with moving sidewalks. Then the Patent that I filed at USF was using stormwater to move sidewalks!!! So now to be in a city desperate for solutions when we get an election that points to major solutions for all the scams I've spoken about for years.

It’s remarkable to me, like RFKjr’s speech about the health poisons in our culture showing up in my email box the day after I presented my mom’s sermon … yes fumbled presenting. While the video of RFKjr was beautiful and focused so much beyond my own rambling. 

102.2 SEEL: About coming into Eden

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Wow what a struggle today. I got outside this morning for the Sunrise, watered my plants and even cleared up a bit.Of course, everything else I tried to do has been a struggle. OH, EXCEPT WRITING HERE. Taking time to write about love and Jesus has been awesome joy and fun. The iPad and pen are a pain in the ass, but it is so wonderful to write in the moment when everything I see and feel is such a total blessing. I know that's why I need to write.

It's like considering the Hurricanes, I'm just immune to them. I never consider them an issue, but instead feel exempt. (Wow, check out the name on this one) Like something about them just doesn't apply to me. I guess, I've felt that about a lot of things. Not afraid of anything seems to come with that, or knowing that I always come out ahead. I joke about how crazy expenses show up only when I get a refund for something else, and it just has happened so much that I don't notice or worry anymore.

I guess that just happened yesterday with my hospital bills. And I certainly noticed and thanked Jesus immediately. I guess I am always thanking Jesus as it's just part of my daily experience. Like I think of going outside earlier and hearing the squirrels chirping at me. Yes of course I chirp back and revel in the fun conversation we have chirp, chirp, chirping. On yes so my next Bible verse is Genesis 1:26-2:9 Consider yourself as God's creation, as an incarnation, or image of God in a particular time, . . .   

So yea of course I am always protected and provided for, as I am the image of God, where all the Earth is at my feet that I may honor it all for the glory of God. I feel how that is what I have at hand now where all things honor God, and all my time and writing is to be and accept this moment with Jesus. And behold it is All - very GOOD!

Like with the Hurricanes I sometimes wonder about why this is so important. I know I have a very unique and keen ability to share and learn from my Angels. I talked about that some yesterday recognizing how it's on Guardian Angels that God has assigned to us for all our needs. And so I have been here so long with them that the experience and conversation is so very focused and contemplative. I never knew that word or what it was all about, until Mary spoke at my first class Saint Theresa's Nine Grades of prayer. Oh yes, I’m here about my latest class now that is SEEL:

Read Romans 8:18-25 (All creation is unfinished and yearns for fulfillment in God). Consider: What are the particular high-Lights or milestones of my life, including my life of faith? Note both the highs and the lows, the times of great hope and of challenge or "groaning.".

So what do I see as key high/lights or fulfillment, and my next step in experience and growth in this life of Faith. What more could I imagine as I love, and as I see so much already. Staying in the love and trust of Jesus is always the whole point and a major challenge for all us mortals, who choose to see with our own eyes and the cultural dynamics created by the propaganda of greed and selfishness. I guess, this is why I must write. Proud and boasting about beating the machine in my death bed, only to discover all is here waiting for us already, where we simply must choose to be the hands and heart of Jesus in each moment.

Yes, I learned that Stepping into Eden is really a choice! Where we choose to live as love and accept all things as gifts, everything can be perceived only as gifts and blessings from God. Yes asking for this Perspective of God and all knowledge opens up, while all fear falls away. Ok I confess I have always feared people reading this Journal as I'm very blunt and specific about many things that not many people will understand, or agree with. I recognize this might be why I'm all alone so much of the time. I have never been very interested in all that is useless in our culture. Then raised with narcissist and sarcastic bullies made me very defensive, and what, insecure maybe.

For it is right that we Praise the Lord: I Love You Dear Lord Jesus Christ, Thank You Dear Lord Jesus Christ, Please lend Your Strength, Love, & Wisdom to grow and achieve as only you can imagine. And I guess this again is about coming into Eden. And where is this, or how can I live and teach here or where it is that I need to be. My next Bible verse is Psalm 33, yes so I'm back into my threes again, isn't that ideal. Consider: What am I waiting for? How is my heart filled with gladness

I guess this is funny too because I’m always coming back to where I seem to be waiting for someone. I know it’s really just Jesus, and there’s no one else I need, and no one else I should wait for. Nor should I really be waiting for anyone. Because the "Word of the Lord is good,” and I see so much in this Goodness everywhere that speaks to me today, beyond another set of threes there are the waters that He sets into motion. The day after our election I read here about how blessed is the nation of the Lord. This really resonates so strongly for me as RFK jr. endorsed Trump and stepped down the day after my Welcome presentation: Mom’s Sermon; which was repeated in his video with so much more focus and dignity than I could ever achieve.

Day six, Read Jeremiah 18:1-6 (We are like clay in the potter's hands). Consider: How do I find myself being shaped and molded by God now? How am I pliable or resistant? Wow, how strong and focused is this, where I just wrote about my Welcome Witness Presentation: Mom’s Sermon; that over took me. I struggled so much to get that done. After my own witness weekend where I cried through all my help letters hoping beyond hope, to find one from my son, but again and again I opened another from my fraternity brothers. And as I struggled through the last of that weekend I had thoughts that my prodigal son story was what I needed to share, only to find it was about those Fraternity Brothers and not about me. So it had to be my Mom's Sermon, which Fr. Kevin called for any way.

Yes, so like Jeremiah, God has been busy reworking this lump of clay that I am. I guess this means my next Welcome Witnessing might be something totally different. And now as I consider this, I realize how I've been slammed down on the wheel to be reworked hundreds of times. And now I recall how other brothers spoke about their transition in Christ. Over and over again men get lost in greed, alcohol, lust and all the other crap in our culture. And of course I went through all that too, returning as the prodigal after my motorcycle accident while in high school. And still I am getting slammed in bike accidents because I'm not listening to the details for each new task before me. This seems so far beyond understanding, and now as I write again, alone, late at night, spoiled rotten with sweet oranges and organic chocolates... I wonder what I needed to add here? Maybe I need to comment about age and immortality as I heard in this exodus message below. Oh Yes, immortal and healed with the oils from Exodus 30:22. . . More things to do!

Exodus reading this morning: The Book of Wisdom says, “God created man for incorruption . . . but through the devil’s envy death entered the world” (Wisdom 2:23–24).

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102.1 SEEL: Manna from Heaven today

 ok, lazy Sunday afternoon, and I stopped to write in my journal and I opened up my iPad and there’s a string of threes in front of me and it’s such a blessing to have the Trinity show-up right in my face. Jesus loves getting right in my face. Of course, he told me to go write. Open it up and there it is: 333 333 113 31 over and over again, it’s such a beautiful thing. I always feel such love and joy and happiness when I get the Trinity right in my face. I always love it when I do the silliest little things that seem so useless. It’s always about me following directions, it’s not about what’s useful and not useful. As if I could ever really know anyway.

I have been really out of it. I'm sore and tired. Alone and bored, feeling sorry for myself. It's funny how I blame my aches and pains for everything. Not doing anything and using that as an excuse. I have to do taxes and research and find files and write letters. I mean, Bonnie even got a thousand dollar invoice and I need to certify a request next. Oh, and the taxes are for my hospital bills.

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Uhg, I finally reported my bike accident to USAA last week. And now I found an email from them and also I found a hospital email to request financial help. When an opened the hospital email up it had already been filled out and all the fees were written off. Oh, that's nice. So Jesus stepped in and fixed everything for me again. And I'm totally perplexed again, messing with this iPad. It keeps getting stuck on words I write. Now I can write again, but it will randomly get locked holding onto something. Then I can’t move until I accept whatever change it wants, then hit “undo” and I can write again! Why does it hold the last word? Sent another apple beta feedback!

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 Yes Sunday, and I've been doing SEEL all week again. So now I need to put it all together. Last week I read everything before I started to blog so it was rushed. Starting earlier is important, as I can really get focused and specific to expand my relationship with You!. Thank you Dearest Love Lord Jesus Christ. To honor this time and priorities in this moment with You. Yes, we have the next Bible verse Psalm 8 Consider: Who has helped me get to this point in my faith journey? 

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Oh this is interesting how much help I've received on my Faith Journey from All Saint Raphael’s Parish! As I've always written and spoken to Jesus about it. And I know Jesus and God are the “ALL IN ALL” wanting only our Joy and Love with Him. There are countless Saints and Angels who are with us all the time waiting for us to ask for something. Like my conversations recently about prayers for wisdom and guidance, it is really about talking with our Guardian Angels. Asking is Loving the Father! And so I've remembered how it is really about learning how much God has done for us. And recognizing that he's done it ALL for us. Recognize the Beauty and Grace that abounds us and then also be humble and grateful for all He's given and shared with us so we can listen and praise Him by sharing each moment with Him.. . . . Asking and then honoring with praise and gratitude!

Of course, this first reading of Psalm 8 was on the morning after All Saints Day and the celebration Jim hosted for Kevin. I really did not want to go to church and was whining about pain and being sore. I realized how much l try to connect and always talk about getting more engaged and involved with this Catholic Community. Yes, so it was really important that I get out, so I had to go. And of course, I was really grateful that I did. Several other guys from the Men's Fraternity were there too . . . Including Joe, who asked the fraternity about getting a car for his daughter, after her’s was lost with the hurricane. . . lol, I thought of Leslie’s son Elliot . . . 

The deepest blessing here is how I need to recognize how important it is to help others. And discovered I had never replied to Joe about a car and also building Grandma Gracie’s Farms as a casino. A second ball I dropped after our first Welcome Retreat when I had mentioned it to him. And this really means I must both listen and understand! Not just be polite and offer a connection, but then to follow up as well and make it real! I must respect where each individual is and share the spirit as I am seeing before me. Like when Jim’s sons came in to bring pizza for Kevin’s Celebration . . . The dog was so direct and focused with them, which came through to me so strongly that l said it was clear he had a good father, since his direction and love with the dog was equally as golden. lol, it’s so weird trying to remember the conversation that happened in the split second and I said something about college and he was doing biology thinking about a PhD. Tuesday at the Exodus meeting, John also mentioned he was looking at a Phd at USF! He even had spoken to Dr. fountain about it. Ha, I remember now that Dr. Fountain was on my PhD Committee. So then I sent something to John about Phd’s and connecting with professors with Google Scholar and I had to copy it to Kevin and Jim now because of sharing it there as well!

Wow, yes and I remember my note to John was how Professor John had hired me after realizing we were both on the same page, from different sides of the fence, him in the ivory tower of course and me in the dirt. Obviously, John and I had a great conversation and a half after Exodus. I remembered that Professor John had paid for my PhD Because he hired me to work for the Journal. And my first experience with the Journal was connected to GOD bringing mankind back to nature with Theocentrism Discussed in an American machine management journal! WOW!!Yes, Psalms Eight sharing how everything has been a gift from God and my choice is always to honor GOD, going out of my way to post this article link here now for you to enjoy another blessing honoring this random synergy in Jesus.

Now the next verse is Psalm 104, Consider: Where do I see this awesome glory revealed in my life and the larger world? And in all truth, l see the glory of God all around me, in everything I see. Like the experience with Jim’s dog and sons. I have chosen to see God‘s perspective in all experiences rough and easy! His Love Is in this moment that I write on my iPad and this beauty of the night breeze blowing over me as I write. Again I see his love and glory everywhere and all around me. Like how earlier in the week Jim offered to go food shopping for me, and here alone at night l harvested purple sweet potatoes from my front yard, and made myself my steak dinner. I actually called Leslie to invite her over to share with me, since I know I made so much and she’s been struggling as much as I have!

 

 

Psalm 104 speaks again about the beauty and majesty of our world and experience that is shared bringing out the waters of life again and again. Where else would I be, of course it’s always about waters moving flowing and being so much more beyond the riches of the world. And it all makes me sing. And I am hungry to praise and glorify GOD.

Funny as I read and wrote here of waters. I remember Jim's house and listening to the conversations between the men. They were still speaking of the Floods and how devastating it has been and will continue to be. And I mentioned how many people have posted to LinkedIn about these floods and all the complaints and I couldn't help myself but comment on how it's all about man's greed and control. Fallow the money! We have a car that controls our culture and all the roads fill with water and all the floods come down the Roads. But we still build them and complain about the floods because we can't evolve beyond the car. Pathetic people all addicted to the car and the control of a car not wanting to even try another way to move. Funny, I never mentioned how my post to Linkedin referred to the solution l dreamed up with my motorcycle accident in high school. Yes, my old high school Dream Jesus gave me, that won the Disney awards, and everyone tried to copy. But never asked me, so never were successful. Course I filed a patent on it in college too, and still no one noticed. . . 

101 SEEL: Allows me to offer these up to Jesus

New SEEL week One: “Spiritual Exercises for Everyday Living” begins again. Of course, it's Page 2 in the book that has my first Highlight, now bolder, darker and needing more attention… “To whom much is given, much is expected.” . . . and it's really something that I've known and tried to come to terms with for a while since I’m so blessed here!

I mean, everything new that I learn in the Catholic Church has really explained and put context to things I've done before. It's been like hearing the hidden secrets that I had stumbled into through trial and error. I still remember Mary first speaking about a powerful experience with Contemplative Prayer and Jesus during my first class: Saint Theresa of Avila’s Nine Grades of Prayer. Mary reminded me of a similar experience, and I just chimed in after her explaining my own. Once again it was more about understanding and realizing what it was all about. It just slammed me that moment, and I likely interrupted her with my big mouth all excited to share. This was also when Lisette realized she's in this deep Contemplative Prayer with Jesus all the time.  Once again this was revealing to me, as with her, when we talked about it again earlier this month . . . and I suddenly realized how my life of prayer was always started asking for Wisdom "ppp" = “Please lend Your Strength, Love, & Wisdom to,” with the Wisdom Lessons and Exodus Speaking it was all the same that we shared.

Now the Theme we started with in this SEEL Week One was all about the Unconditional Love of God.

And as I read this first passage from the Bible to pray about, it felt like it was written just for me. . . calling me forward into His LOVE from the "Waters and Rivers" where I have lived for 30 years. I know I was blessed to be "Moving Rivers" for so long as a civil engineer. And I guess I'm sorta in wonder as I consider what I did. I could some how feel into the dynamic systems of the rivers that allowed me to change and move them. It really wasn't rocket science, I simply changed system elements to see what happened, and then used flowrate and elevation charts to define what worked best. It was what always worked for me, trial and error again, like everything else I learned in my whole life.

But now I read about God calling me by name away from this life moving rivers. A year ago when I first started SEEL, I was distracted back into modeling rivers for maybe 6 months. Of course, the day before I was supposed to start work, I got into a bike accident, so you think I would have known it wasn't right for me. But that same work is what brought me to St Pete as well, again lasting for about 6 months when I moved into start a new office before Covid hit closing it. Now I've started teaching again, and have been trying to stay away from Rivers. Of course, I got a call yesterday about helping with a model for $30k. What's funny about this, is doing the midnight models like this allowed me to play with my kids 24/7. I was totally blessed to be able to spend so much time with my children, so extra cash now might be good too.

Now it's really been about spending the time with Jesus. And now again I'm sore and tired from another bike accident. It's my third bike accident in thirty years. I remembered my first on campus at USF in Tampa. Then my second last year on 9/11/2023, labor day before I was planning to work again. And now it was 10/2/24 that I got smashed again.  All I know about it now, was that I needed to slow down more.

My son told me to stay alone in my new house. And I soon realized it was about sharing more deeply in the Unconditional Love of Jesus. I kept trying to find a way to share this, Airbnb and whatever else I could think of. And I guess I need to stop searching or trying to "find a way" to share and Love as only Jesus could express this through me. I'm certainly never going to "plan something" suitable to the power and passion that Jesus Has for me. I still jump on inspirations and thrive on the divine guidance I see in every moment. 

Yes, I know this week I'm trying not to move, and stay relaxed and at ease for my body to heal. Course I know I've beaten pain all my life. I mean, I can't count the times I've been hit, punished, cut, hurt, beaten into blood & bruises. I was always surprised I never broke a bone. But now I've cut my head for a second time. But still I've always been able to muscle through pain, and know that's just who I am.   

Of course, the next Bible Verse is about the Providence of God where three times he says to avoid even the thought of needing something. And as with these aches and pains from my latest bike accident, I know they are temporary and insignificant. . . . Sorta like the thought for food, clothing, or thoughts of any desire, are simply a waste of time and effort. While all thoughts and efforts must be towards the Kingdom of God, and all else will be provided. And again it's a verse that's been written for me. Like calling me by name to step away from the rivers. Now again I've been given so much Blessing from the Kingdom of God that I have no need or desire for anything, trusting in the Providence of God.

Again this is the critical challenge of seeking God's Perspective and Wisdom for this moment in my own Spiritual Growth. I've written many times about this too. Understanding that seeking first the Kingdom brings me back to the very first line I wrote here. . . “To whom much is given, much is expected” . . . so even now as I recover from another bike accident. I suffer through aches and pains knowing this allows me to offer this suffering up to Jesus and accept this time of peace and solitude as more time to study, learn and grow in Jesus, again God's Providence giving to me.

This next Bible verse brings me back again to knowing the experience of God's Providence carrying me through the "Waters of Life." I know each day I'm protected and carried. Even with another Bike accident, where I accept the lesson to slow down more and focus on what's important. Knowing it is all in the Love of God and carrying me forward. Course with muscling through the pains of being bullied all my life, I've always known I'd be fine, I'm safe and protected. This obviously doesn't mean, I avoid all troubles and pains, but they all come and go where I'm always growing and coming out stronger than before.

Now the next Bible Verse for this first week of SEEL is Psalms 131. This is about being at peace in the Lord . . . I guess this is why I've been able to come this far. I know I'm always protected, I know I'm Loved and Guided by God. I know it will all come out fine in the Providence of God. Sure I get impatient and try to do what I think I need to do next. And this has been my focus here alone in this house. Yes it's a big beautiful house so I thought I needed to share it and open the doors to everyone. Clearly that wasn't the best thing for me, or what was necessary. 

Of course, this leads into the next verse this week in SEEL. It's not something for me to know, but to trust and accept that GOD KNOWS. Again this bring me back to the Kingdom First. Trusting and knowing in God's Providence where all things come through God. Its not my work or will, or desire that brings things forth for me, but it's all in God's Hands. . . again trusting in the Providence of God. Trusting this Unconditional Love of God!

Wow, I'm listening to the Intouch ministry on the JoyFM.com radio this morning. God repeats Himself for us to learn and grow by being obedient in God. It takes courage to listen and follow.